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Good Stories are Powerful Lifelines.

Why I Started Bitter/Sweet & How Our First Group Went

9/10/2018

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Picture
Hello, my name is Lane....

And despite my constantly busy life, I've never stopped trying to find ways to give a little bit more of my time to under-privileged communities. 


I’ve worked as a counselor for troubled youth, I’ve participated in local LGBTQ+ support groups, and in college I ran a queer identified women's' support group called QWEEN (it's still running actually).

And as a married bisexual woman I've experienced more bi-erasure than I could wish on anyone - from both straight and queer communities. Even during my time running QWEEN at college, I can recall more than one instance of being questioned for allowing bi/pan individuals as regular members.

​Much of why I feel tension exists within the community about bisexuality is because we do honestly have the privilege of living under the radar. At the time same time, however, that means our identity is usually not acknowledged or given a safe space to exist. It’s a 
Bitter / Sweet experience. 

So about a month ago, Samantha, RESCQU NET's Executive Director, contacted me about a new support group program we're now officially launching next week (18th)! 

Based on my previous support group experience, facilitating seemed like a role I could easily step into and a great opportunity to help support the community.  I was happy to join the newly formed team.

During our initial talks, we tried to narrow down what direction this group would take and the one that stood out to me personally was leading a group for bisexual individuals who feel their identity is more often than not swept under the rug. 

With this group, Bitter / Sweet, I can support Bi and queer people like me, and help the straight individuals in their lives who don’t understand.

As a married bisexual woman I've experienced more Bi-erasure than I could wish on anyone - from both straight and queer communities. ~ Lane Ramsay
As the day of the first meeting grew nearer, my anxiety was building up. I wanted to make sure that this group was successful and that those who reached out would feel secure and safe coming back to each meeting. The hour before the group I was pacing across my living room. My husband had to calm me down and force me to take a few deep breaths. 

The group officially began and after some nervous introductions, we jumped right into members detailing stories about their experiences.

There was point about halfway through the meeting when things started to flow more naturally and members felt more comfortable with one another. Questions were asked, advice was given, and thoughts and personal experiences were shared between the group members. 


Each person seemed more than willing to open up and I started to see the members form bonds out of their shared experiences. I felt relieved, and happy to see the potential of Bitter / Sweet. 


So, can you do us a quick favor?
In an effort to make sure Bitter / Sweet continues we are doing all we can to reach out to the larger community. We need your help to spread the word to those who could also benefit from this space.

The resources shared between members will benefit each person who attends and serve as a reminder that they are not alone, they do exist, and they need resources just like everyone else.

Help us out by Sharing this article, and if you believe in this group like I do,  donate $10 dollars to fund our next group!
How to keep your identity hidden online
Why the web is built to out you

Author: Lane Ramsay

Lane is the Facilitator of the newly formed Bisexual / Pansexual group Bitter / Sweet.  She's spent most of her life counseling troubled youth and the LGBT+ community.  She's recently married her husband and experiences the same Bi-erasure she is counseling for with us now.  Join her group! 
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