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Good Stories are Powerful Lifelines.

Why Halloween is Just the Best for Invisible LGBTQ+ People

10/30/2018

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Ghosts and Goblins and Ghouls and Gender Bending Gays all around! 

Tomorrow kids will be knocking on your door, and most of the adults will be out to their own parties, dressed in a variety of different costumes from the sexy nurse, to Lumber-Jack Skellington (I'm disappointed the internet doesn't have a picture for that one).​
Halloween is upon us and conveniently, today is also the last day of LGBT+ history month, so in this blog, we'd like to take the time to reflect on the history of Halloween in the LGBT+ community and why this holiday's continued keeping is so important!
​
First, it should be noted:
​Halloween started out as a religious holiday and make no bones about it, it's still sacred for many.  Samhain (pronounced Sowwin) was the ancient Celtic religious holiday Halloween is currently known for.  Before it's "transition" and absorption within Christian and eventually corporate-culture, it was joined with a variety of other holidays around the fall by mostly northern-European people. 

The Italian people still celebrate Borgo a Mozzano throughout the month of October which looks more like Halloween than Samhain did and is the very likely "usurper."

This religious origin to Halloween does need to be respected, as do those who consider tomorrow night holy.  But this holiday is nothing like its previous form.  It's now considered "#GayChristmas."
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A post shared by Thair (@forboyslikeme) on Oct 30, 2018 at 7:01am PDT

Halloween's Drag History

It should come as no surprise that a holiday about dressing up resulted in a few "drag" parties.  Cross-dressing is an irreverent, but accepted act on this most sacred of days for the LGBT+ community. 

In the 1950s-70s when being gay was outlawed, this allowed a kind of "acceptance" to bloom in gay bars and counter-cultural gathering places for the evening.  

Starting on the major coasts of the United States, many venues featured dress-up parties for the adults. For the closeted, invisible, gay clubs throughout the cities of San-Francisco, the out-and-proud, bold-and-beautiful drag scene which was often viewed as "a vaudeville stage show" got to shine proudly. 

This provided people a space.  A space to "negotiate" with the world around them and have a day where they could play with their genders and sexuality and have no recourse.  

This grew only more important in the 80's as the AIDS epidemic swept through.  

Halloween shifted at that time, from a holiday to play with your identity without stress, to a mardi-gras of sorts.  A day to cut loose, to be free, and to experience one's LGBT+ identity but also a day to remember the people who had been lost.  The people "who aren't at this party."

From that point forward, Halloween became synonymous with permission to be unabashedly gay.  Permission to be trans.  Permission to break the hard-and-fast societal rule loud and clear.  

Halloween's Global Popularization

Parties, Gay or straight, are fun.  Really fun.  And they look fun.  So they caught on. 

Moving into the late 80's and early 90s, American cultural festivities swept the nation and ran across seas.  According to CNN,  the British grocery store chain, Tesco's sales of pumpkins in 2005, was tripled by 2010, almost entirely because of British people picking up what was mostly a forgotten holiday until families saw Hocus Pocus and Nightmare Before Christmas.  

Popular culture - originally gay culture - created a holiday that adults could give their children.  It was fun, and most of all - it was consumable. It could sell. Now the holiday is celebrated worldwide in Japan, the UK, the middle east, Africa, everywhere.  

LGBTQ+ people the world over now "reap" the same benefits San Francisco did - identity negotiation.

What Halloween Means for Minorities

On any ordinary day, the idea of a man in a dress, or a gender-swapped Dean Winchester is not well regarded at the local grocery store.

Going to a party at a conservative friend's home "looking like a Dyke" is dangerous.  For teenagers, cross-dressing or using makeup is reserved for females, and assuming identities beyond that of traditional society is so frowned upon that we require organizations to provide support under the radar, half-way houses and homeless shelters when it goes wrong, and suicide-lifelines specifically for those people who do not conform. 

But on Halloween, you're most conservative of the conservative friends are okay with it all.  You can go out in public "in drag" you can go out with barely any clothes on at all, you can party and grind on anyone you want, and you have somewhat of a "pass."  It's Halloween and therefore expected that you'll assume the identity of someone they believe you're not.  

To the LGBTQ+ community, Halloween is a sacred holiday because it observes the hidden identities we want to "try on" alongside our silly costume.  We want to be the sexy ass-less chaps cowboy or the naughty nurse - we're allowed.  

​And that....is freeing.  

But if you can't participate

Participating in this idea of changing who you are to "try on" an identity is called Identity Tourism and it's not reserved for Halloween. 

You can also do it online, safely, without your parents knowing.

Come visit our peer support group, "bittersweet" tonight (10/30/18) to discuss how! 

If you don't qualify or were late to the party, no worries! 
Learn more about identity negotiation here
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Or get ready to vote on november 6th with our voting toolkit! Why you may not vote and how to! 

Author:  Samantha V. Logan

Samantha is the Executive Director of RESCQU.NET, an online Community Manager, and full-stack marketer.  She launched Trans* Youth Channel in 2013 to record her transition and help other transgender people online transition safely.  She saw a need to protect people who weren't out yet, and transitioned the organization to make the site you see today.
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Why You May Not Vote, and How You Can Change That

10/23/2018

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Hi, there!

I'm Erin, the Weekly Digest - and if you choose to volunteer - Volunteer Coordinator here at RESCQU.NET!

In lieu of a regular blog post this week, I feel like it’s important we discuss something that is happening at the beginning of next month: voting.

These days, everyone is talking about voting as "why you should vote." The language of “motivation” going around seems to assume that people don’t vote because they're lazy or they don’t care.

What about those of us who find voting extremely difficult for other reasons?
I have anxiety. Really bad anxiety. Especially in highly charged crowds.

So, the polls seem VERY scary to me.

It’s so much more than just getting off of the couch and waiting in line to me. The idea alone nauseates me and makes my muscles twitch.

There are millions of other reasons one may not be willing or able to vote from anxiety to active voter suppression.  If you’re closeted or have any reason whatsoever that you are afraid or hesitant to vote, we want you to know that that feeling is valid, but workarounds have to be found.

​
But I am lucky enough to live in a state that allows me to mail in my ballot every year. Not everyone has that resource, and if they do, they're often not aware it exists.  

This blog provides you the resources needed to work around your hurdles & cast that vote!

How to vote in Every State, and Whether You Can Mail it in!

This below state voting database includes 3 pieces of information for each state: 
  1. The link to the state's voting page to receive information for and register to vote! 
  2. Can you vote by mail? 
  3. Can you vote online?
I sincerely hope that the chart above offers you some voting assistance, but if you need more, we've also embedded a very helpful channel from the VlogBrothers and DFTBA about how to vote in each state.  You'll need to go to the youtube channel to find your state.
​ 
​If you're in a state that does not allow for mail-in or online voting, you will have to report to your designated location.  While that is a significant hurdle though, we have a few more options for you as well.
Go to this channel and find your state!

Do you Work on Voting Day?

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Though I'd mentioned anxiety as a hurdle of mine, it's certainly not the only or most prominent hurdle.

​Many people work on election day and cannot take time off due to financial restraints.

​​If this applies to you, you can visit
Vote411.org and enter your address to see if your employer is legally required to give you paid time off to vote on election day. Every area varies a little in their terms, so make sure that you're looking at the correct precinct that you’ll be voting in!

How to Fight Voter Suppression

Last, and the certainly scariest of the hurdles, is the blatant voter suppression tactics that are running amok all over the country.

I'm not going to expand on all of them, simply because it is a hot topic right now and there are a lot of people who are saying it better than I can right now.  For more information head over to this
 New York Times article that discusses themost recent tactics in the "age of Trump".  

Knowing about these tactics is vital to getting your vote cast, but if you find yourself oppressed, you find people telling you your vote doesn't matter, or you are physically barred from voting,  here's the number 1 thing you can get that will fight this: 

Know How Your State Provides Voting Information

Every state is required to inform the federal government how they plan to educate their citizens on the issues most prominently displayed during the voting process. 

Some of them are easy, like Colorado which provides a "bluebook" or voter information ballot mailed to every home and provided online.

Other states put it in harder to reach spots, but they can ALL be found on the federal registry.  
  1. Go to to this link at the state legislator's site.
  2. Scroll down to your state and check the section it's in.
  3. and it tells you where the state must have the information.
  4. then search google for "[state] [voter information source]"
  5. and it will be within the first 5 links! 

Know What's on Your Ballot, Well Before You Vote

We're also going to leave one last tool for your toolbox to make sure you can get around any hurdle you have to voting.  The internet.  

More spectifically, the internet has deemed your vote important, so they've created a wikipedia specifically for your local, state, and federal elections over at Ballotpedia.org.  

This site has literally everything you need ot know about the candidates, policies and more.  all you have to do is navigate to the local page you're interested in, hit search, and read! 

​https://ballotpedia.org/Main_Page
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About Erin Tschudi

​Erin is the volunteer with the largest tenure here at RESCQU.NET because it allows her to keep connected with the LGBT+ community.  As a bi woman who is soon to be getting married to her future husband she feels deeply for the community and wants to keep that connection.  So she works to train our volunteers, welcome our new community members, and keep the wheels turning.
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But Did They Listen?  The Impact of Nanette, One Year Later

10/16/2018

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"Where are the quiet gays supposed to go? The pressure on my people to express our identity and pride through the metaphor of party is...intense."
Over the past summer, much of the world has become widely familiar with
Hannah Gadsby’s Netflix special,
Nanette.

And for good reason.  


After it’s debut in Melbourne, Australia last year, the show has been met with widespread critical acclaim and the response from most minority populations, particularly from the LGBTQ+ and #MeToo communities, showed how powerful and necessary her message was.  Even more so when it’s placed in today's political context.

Although it’s marketed as a comedy special, Gadsby’s Nanette delivers far more than laughs.
It’s equal parts heartbreaking raw emotion, intensely personal storytelling, and stunningly artful comedic and critical prose.

So today’s blog, half way into LGBT+ history month, we are reviewing the impact of Nanette and how it's opened doors for LGBT+ communities to share their most silent stories.

So the Question today is: 

What is Nanette’s impact months after the show’s finale?
Small Warning Though: If you haven’t seen this show, and you’re in an environment that allows you to do so, go watch it.  Bring tissues, and reserve an hour or so to think about it afterward.

For real, you're going to cry. It made me cry.

What is Nanette?

Hannah Gadsby performed the “comedy” special Nanette on stage throughout 2017-2018 in Australia, Europe, the United States, and Canada. ​
In all cases, audiences went in expecting a traditional stand-up comedy set and were left shaken, inspired, speechless and/or all three. ​

​In fact, Hannah set out to create Nanette as a farewell to comedy. Instead, she used the stage to tell her story the way it had never fully been told - in the most honest fashion possible. 
What she presents in Nanette is a harsh look at how comedy has long been a place that encourages humiliation towards oppressed groups of people. What Hahnah has ultimately achieved is a thought-provoking piece of art that continues to inspire marginalized communities the world over, to tell their own stories and break the silent status-quo. ​​

What is the Status-Quo?

Members of the LGBT+ community, too often feel a considerable amount of pressure from society to keep their more heart-breaking stories of discrimination and harsh realities hidden, in an effort not to disrupt heterosexual individuals’ “comfort zones”. ~ Lane Lunsford
LGBT+ people and other minorities are told that we should remain silent and ashamed so others can be eased into the problem, or allow them to ignore it entirely.

We are told, “I don’t have a problem with LGBT+ individuals, so long as you keep it to yourself.”

The U.S military’s “don’t ask, don’t tell” policy from 1994-2011 highlights the level of unease that knowing the details of our lives creates in straight-cis-hetero people.

How Did Nanette Change That Status-Quo?

What Gadsby does in her hour-long special is what so many of us have long sought to do; Communicate our stories un-filtered and un-apologetically in a non-self-deprecating way.
Nanette tells Hannah's story In a way that does not conceal traumatic details.  She does not spare outsiders from the discomfort and fear that LGBT+ individuals face in our daily lives.

It’s an inspiring Concept; to proudly share our whole story, not just the edited version mainstream society is willing to hear.

While she specifically targets her fellow comedians and the art of comedy itself for its particularly negative impacts on minorities, her performance represents how we are all taught to bring ourselves down in order shield others from the traumas of our experiences.

We have adapted to the idea that we must suffer in order to increase our creativity, and ultimately, our worth. By sharing her story in its entirety - the good bits and the harsh realities - we see that our power resides in our voices.

Comedians have relied on self-deprecating humor for a long time now. Comedians Use bits and pieces of their personal lives as the building blocks of seemingly harmless jokes.

Gadsby takes those stories further, to point out how often audiences are laughing at parts of a comedian’s life that are deeply troubling. Those “seemingly harmless jokes” stir up memories that are not so harmless, but we as an audience are not asked to consider this further.

Gadsby reminds us over and over again that we are paying for her to make us feel something and to question our own role in her trauma. In this way, Nanette in addition to giving voice to marginalized individuals has also created conversations amongst those who have never thought about the pain they have caused to others.


​They are left questioning themselves, rather than having Gadsby resolve those questions for them.

But, did they listen?

Gadsby is not the first comedian to open up so personally about her life. There are plenty of other powerful comedians that push us to question social standards and look at our own actions. 

Nanette stands out because of how far it has reached.


Articles on the Washington post, and culture mass.  It won an Emmy. Discussions reached Forbes, a business magazine. .  

Although the hits are slowing, and criticisms suggest cis-hetero-men are broadly rejecting it, Nanette is still resonating throughout the LGBT+ community as a piece that empowers us to speak up and in this area, it is showing NO signs of stopping.

Our stories are important and our trauma is real. We are not alone in our struggles and it is crucial that we have spaces that lift us up rather than stirring up fear.

RESCQU NET also values your stories and we offer you the support to share your stories, in a closet-friendly manner. Indeed right now, as an invisible community member, you are experiencing these harsh realities and cruel prejudice already. 

We are here so that you can discuss your experiences with others and gain resources in our Support group program.  So consider attending one! 
How to keep yourself Anonymous Online
Why we started a Bi/Pan support group

Author: Lane Ramsay

Lane is the Facilitator of the newly formed Bisexual / Pansexual group Bitter / Sweet.  She's spent most of her life counseling troubled youth and the LGBT+ community.  She's recently married her husband and experiences the same Bi-erasure she is supporting you with now.  Join her group! 
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Net Safety 201:  How to Mask Your presence with ToR Browser

10/2/2018

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At RESCQU.NET we service people who could be cut off from their family, hurt, kicked out, ridiculed, or worse, if it's discovered that they're accessing LGBT+ resources.

We often have to help people who, as a result of these situations, must be so far under the radar that no 5-step Infographic to internet safety will cut it (you should still start here though).  

So to help those of you in this tough spot, we have a living blog post, How to Keep your LGBTQ+ Identity Hidden Online. that we constantly update once per month so you can learn more about keeping yourself safe.

We've added a summary of this post to it, but here, we're talking about Net Safety Class 201:
ToR browser and erasing your "net presence". 

Before we can talk about ToR Though, we need to talk about your "IP address" or how the internet knows what computer you are accessing it from.

Your Address is Like Caller ID

Picture[Infographic] IP addresses and internet structure.
The Internet is generally a very open place.

Internet Protocol Addresses or IP addresses are like envelopes for your "data" that are used to get it from its starting point (your computer) to the end destination (where the information is) and back. 

IP addresses carry necessary data that the receiving device can authenticate you with, much like a caller ID. If you seem legit, they'll reply back, or save you into their "contacts" and "call you" later.


If someone can read all the places with your IP Addresses, they can piece together who you are, and what you see on the internet.

​While the average interested person, school, or company, doesn’t typically want to go through the hassle of putting all those pieces together, there's a point
where you might find someone who is that interested. 

Like say, if you're 
a Bisexual teen with very "strict" parents and with strict parental control services.

So How Do You "Erase" your IP Address?

There are several ways to prevent IP addresses being linked to you and your information.

​Systems or devices that don't require a user name and password to gain access to the Internet are reasonably untraceable, but this isn’t always an option.  There could be time limitations, or people will catch on because systems are 
too public, or web filters block certain sites at libraries.

Anonymous proxies and Virtual Private Networks (VPNs) are other ways to hide IP addressees, which we'll save for later blogs, but even then, these are difficult to set up and get access to, may cost money to use, and initial access is usually tracked.

The easiest way to mask your IP Address is using Tor browser, “The Onion Router”.

What is ToR browser?

First, a quick definition of Tor Browser and then we'll explain:

Tor is a browser that inefficiently sends and repackages your data through several relays and special encryption hubs on the internet, before arriving at it's final location.  S
ending your data through several extra stops makes it difficult to link the originator of the data request (you) to the target of the request (The site's servers with the information you wanted).

Whew, that’s a mouthful – let’s break that down a bit.
  • Routing is how data is directed through the Internet.
  • Packets are the bundles of data you sent out and their routing information
    (the from and to addresses on an Envelope). 
  • Encryption is a technique that scrambles information so no one, but the sender and receiver can understand it.

So basically, instead of sending a letter straight to your aunt:
  1. You send it to someone that takes your envelope and scrambles the to and from information.
  2. They put it in a new envelope and send it to someone else who does the same thing.
  3. Several times after this is repeated the last person holds on to all of those envelopes, removes your letter, repackages it, and sends the letter in a brand new envelope to your aunt. 
  4. That new letter can't be opened without the old envelopes and the new data, but to your aunt, it looks like it came from that last person in the chain.
  5. She responds to the letter back to that last person, they shove the return letter into that old envelope and do a “return to sender
  6. Each person in the chain repeats the process until your aunt's reply gets back to you.
  7. If the letter was intercepted by a nosy third party somewhere in the middle, or even at your aunt’s house, they wouldn’t know where it came from or where it was supposed to go. 

    Side Note: There’s real mail services that do something like this, if you'd like to have some fun.
    ​ ​
ToR browser's primary strength is that it’s easy to download and use, and designed precisely to mask IP addresses without extra configuration (in most cases), It's pretty good right out of the box as that's exactly what w'ere trying to achieve here.

​​Tor’s primary weakness however is that you have to download it. It has to be on your system.

​If someone else is monitoring you or your system, just having the software may raise some suspicions. Tor downloads are often completely blocked on some sites and they will not allow you access via Tor browser.

Okay Cool.  So How Do I Start Using It?

Tor is best utilized via the “Tor Browser” which is available for free from http://www.torproject.org.

Basically, you download the browser, and start using it, it’s that simple.

However, there are some caveats and limitations on what Tor can do for you. There are a list of warnings from the download page that you should definitely read and consider. 

For example;
"Tor does not protect all of your computer's Internet traffic when you run it. Tor only protects your applications that are properly configured to send their Internet traffic through Tor.
So, if you use the Tor Browser, it’s easy.  If you want to use other network services (say Skype), there's a learning curve.  Aaand you've got some work to do.
​

So, I use Tor, and Then I’m Totally Safe, Right?

No. it’s not that simple.  

What we can say is, "Tor will ensure that your IP address isn’t recorded on the other end of your internet exchange." That’s it. 

There are a few problems.

1. Sticking out like a sore thumb
It’s similar to using a fake name when you go to a hotel a lot. After a while, if you're the only one using an alias, they can tell you're the one signing your bills Mary Winchester of Lawrence, Kansas.

if you’re the only one using Tor in your physical location on your Internet Service Provider's (ISP’s) network, eventually, with enough monitoring, the person you’re trying to avoid, will figure it out and you'll just stick out like a sore thumb.

The network administrator or authorities can pinpoint traffic right back to you.   Using services outside of Tor, alongside it is like using your real credit card to pay for the hotel under your fake name.


2. The Content is Still Readable
This also doesn’t immediately prevent your local network administrator from being able to see what you’re trying to send or what you get back (which is why Tor isn’t enough!).

You still need to follow the 101 tips we offered you in prior blogs to really utilize Tor’s benefits.

3.  The origin and destinations are still the same
Those first hops out to the Tor network have to go through your local network and ISP. Tor isn’t magic!

There are ways to provide extra security to help hide from local system administrators like using Tor bridges if your network administrators or your ISP block direct access to Tor, 
and obfuscation; doing things to make figuring out your data and where you’re sending it mor difficult.

The Bottom Line: This is a Wrench. You Need a Tool Box.

Tor is only one tool of several you can use to protect your online identity.  Over the course of the next several months, we hope to give you more tools that you can use in concert to keep yourself safe.  

Be on the lookout for them, and join our local support groups, and weekly email digest so we can give these resources to you manually - no digital paper trail.  

Simpler ways to keep your identity hidden onlnie
Why the web is built to out you in the first place

This Article is curated by Jerri P (updated monthly)

Jerri joined RESCQU.NET to assist in attaining secure and safe technological systems.  Jerry did their masters in computer technology on computer languages and enforcing SSL documentation.  They now help us with the closet-friendly partner organization program, and inform you of the dangers of searching the internet unprotected.

Guest Author: Jeffery Kenworthy

Jeff is an avid user of Tor Browser and a "hacker in training".  He specializes in finding weak points in internet security for sites, databases, servers, and devices so software engineers can plug them.  He contributed a good deal to this article and hopes for LGBTQ+ safety to become a bigger issue in the Net Neutrality and Security debate.
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